‘Seek first to understand, then to be understood’- Stephen & Cory
This statement is all about listening to each other effectively so needs are met on either side. This can be established between parent and child even before the child has been born, and for either parent even if it is the mother who is carrying the baby in utero for nine months, the role of the father is as important in listening to the baby’s needs as well as the mother.
Some people may seem to be more tuned into their unborn baby and its not because they are any different to anyone else but have become more open and conscious to listening to their child both in the physical and non physical sense. Some mothers who are not relaxed and lead a busy life sometimes need reassurance that they may not have felt their baby kick over a period of time and as a Midwife I would explain to them to rest and relax quietly, drink some cold water and be come aware of their baby’s movements and obviously seek further advice if that is not the case. When all is fine and the baby has been felt, calmness and confidence is restored.
Mothers can become more conscious of their needs and their baby’s needs by learning to breathe, find ways to relax that they are comfortable with, be calm within themselves and eventually listen to their baby on a deeper level as a baby cannot be heard verbally. Doing this during pregnancy will help them approach labour with ease, calmness and more confidence and help achieve the birth they both wish for. Once the baby is born, the baby communicates through crying which is verbal communication and non verbals by facial expressions, body movements, a variety of reasons why a baby may cry.
If Mothers and Fathers listen and are aware of their baby cue’s and behaviour they can respond to their baby' s needs accordingly.
Happy calm parents = Happy calm baby!